Thursday, November 04, 2004

THIS is the man we "elected". I hope everyone who voted for him is happy. He's a 7 year old moron, and he's leading the most powerful country in the world.

I'm going to go puke.

Monday, November 01, 2004

I just bought Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas.




I have always loved the Grand Theft Auto series of games. Even the first two editions, which were fairly simple graphically, but engaging and funny.

After an incredible amount of anticipation, finally the newest chapter has been released! Normally I wait for a new game to have been out for a while, and let the cost go down, and usually purchase it used.

But this time, I could NOT WAIT. So I bought it.

SO far -- I am NOT happy. It spends WAY too much time on teeny details -- your clothes, hair, car detail, muscle tone, hunger level, respect level -- and way too much time on the stuff that made the previous games GREAT. I should be out killing pimps, not seeing if I look better bald or with a big fro. And even some of those elements are insipid and unrealistic. Example: You can go to the barber and he can somehow GIVE YOU a beard.

I've played about 20 missions so far, and the last one that I could stand last night involved me dancing. I had to do a good dance (you have to mash buttons to the beat, Dance Dance Revolution style) to get in good with the DJ. I HAD TO DANCE!! Why?!? I had my AK -- how about just plugging the DJ in the gut, and stealing her equipment??

My right thumb is now the strongest muscle in my body after spending 25 minutes repeatedly pressing the "X" button on a treadmill in the gym. It's true, you can run a treadmill, ride a stationary bike, lift weights. Whee. What a thrill. (Sarcasm alert!)

It may get better, but so far it has removed everything I loved about the previous chapters and added in elements from rhythm games and game like The Sims to bog it down in minutia. It should be called Grand Theft Auto: Tamagatchi... your character is more of a virtual pet than a gangster. Worried about your hairdo... what were they THINKING?

By the way -- Graphics: OUTSTANDING. Environment: HUGE. Story: WENT AWAY (you supposedly came back because your mother was murdered and then you're framed for a murder... then all that goes away somehow). Dialog: My street lingo is a little out of date to understand much of what they're saying. It sounds like it's probably good - it's acted well - but I don't get a lot of it.

I'll try it for a little while more, but I am kicking myself for spending $50 on a game I assumed would be amazing. The first 20-some-odd missions sure aren't.

Posted by Hello