Thursday, February 19, 2004

Last weekend I watched Underworld.

A simple story

A complicated tale
Seen it before

A fresh perspective
Visually ordinary

Special effects-y

It was way poorer than I expected. They effectively used slow-motion, camera angles, editing, bland color palettes, sound effects, and actors that all look exactly alike to completely obfuscate what could have been a pleasant, exciting story.

The opening scene which takes place in a subway and involves a lot of shooting really set the tone. I had no idea who was shooting at whom. The whole time I was thinking, "Didn't they just show that guy in a different place?" I'm not sure if one guy was moving around, or the actors just looked so much alike that I was unknowingly thinking of two different people singly.

I guess there is kind of big twist towards the end, but by that time you probably don't care -- you just want all of them, Vampires, Werewolves, whatever, to just kind of kill each other off.

If there is ever a Mystery Science Theater 4000, I would recommend this as the first installment. I was cracking jokes at the screen the whole time.

There is some shooting, there is some action, there are some semi-decent special effects when the werewolves are far away (when they are close they just look like rubber masks), but it is WAY too long. And the soundtrack is horrible. The music has lots of industrial thumps and slams at ridiculous places, making you think that door are being slammed and people are jumping around when none of that is happening. The sound is possibly the most distracting of all.